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Search: Posts Made By: fitliker
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12th Jul 2023, 16:00
Replies: 20,899
Views: 1,318,189
Posted By fitliker

Pull back and the cows get smaller , keep pulling...

Pull back and the cows get smaller , keep pulling and they get big again , push the foot peddle inand they get dizzy watching you tumble through the mirth
9th Jul 2023, 20:55
Replies: 20,899
Views: 1,318,189
Posted By fitliker

Some fellas will do anything to get a woman to...

Some fellas will do anything to get a woman to sit on their face.
Although he may get a surprise when miss Holland gets back to her/his seat
1st Jul 2023, 00:52
Replies: 20,899
Views: 1,318,189
Posted By fitliker

When two corporations merge , Ann Summers and...

When two corporations merge , Ann Summers and some company that sank all its development money into vertical take off fighter jets
They called it the Splooger jet , leaves a very pleasant...
1st Jul 2023, 00:48
Replies: 20,899
Views: 1,318,189
Posted By fitliker

We need a bigger plane said the Captain hunting...

We need a bigger plane said the Captain hunting that Jaws monster
25th Jun 2023, 13:02
Replies: 20,899
Views: 1,318,189
Posted By fitliker

No escape from that fart competition, in a...

No escape from that fart competition, in a cockpit fart competition the donning of the oxygen mask is considered cowardly capitulation .
If your other crew member asks you if you smell smoke you...
25th Jun 2023, 12:52
Replies: 20,899
Views: 1,318,189
Posted By fitliker

Strange vessel to start a fart competition ,...

Strange vessel to start a fart competition , could be fatal . If someone drops the borscht fueled silent butt deadly fart and accidentally follows through . Almost certain death in a confined space .
24th Jun 2023, 19:48
Replies: 20,899
Views: 1,318,189
Posted By fitliker

So be it , Free House it be . I liked that one...

So be it , Free House it be .
I liked that one as well . It supports the old school type humour .
Archibald says to his wife , put your coat on I am going out . Where we going she asks . I am going...
24th Jun 2023, 02:47
Replies: 20,899
Views: 1,318,189
Posted By fitliker

Can we have an open House ?

Can we have an open House ?
22nd Jun 2023, 03:39
Replies: 20,899
Views: 1,318,189
Posted By fitliker

You might have to burn your undergarments after...

You might have to burn your undergarments after this ride
22nd Jun 2023, 03:33
Replies: 20,899
Views: 1,318,189
Posted By fitliker

Over target , bomb bays open , release the bowels

Over target , bomb bays open , release the bowels
22nd Jun 2023, 03:32
Replies: 20,899
Views: 1,318,189
Posted By fitliker

Drop yer flaps or it’s going to be a hard landing

Drop yer flaps or it’s going to be a hard landing
19th Jun 2023, 22:46
Replies: 20,899
Views: 1,318,189
Posted By fitliker

The children make fart noises now to honour our...

The children make fart noises now to honour our old Dukes traditional salute to the working class from the balcony .
Traditions must be kept up .
13th Jun 2023, 15:23
Replies: 20,899
Views: 1,318,189
Posted By fitliker

Word to the wise my old mucker , if a man with a...

Word to the wise my old mucker , if a man with a sword is asking you to bow .
You are not about to be knighted . You are about to get a new haircut minus your noggin .
13th Jun 2023, 15:21
Replies: 20,899
Views: 1,318,189
Posted By fitliker

Only 42 daggers in your back , I had the entire...

Only 42 daggers in your back , I had the entire country wanting to stick it to me .
13th Jun 2023, 15:19
Replies: 20,899
Views: 1,318,189
Posted By fitliker

Never mind the cut , feel the quality . Good...

Never mind the cut , feel the quality .
Good job the tailor left lots of room in the back as it might be difficult to put on with all those daggers in ones back
8th Jun 2023, 19:48
Replies: 20,899
Views: 1,318,189
Posted By fitliker

We painted it Beige as the wife had some paint...

We painted it Beige as the wife had some paint left over from painting the ceiling beige .
8th Jun 2023, 19:44
Replies: 20,899
Views: 1,318,189
Posted By fitliker

It can spot the ASBO on bikes at twenty miles and...

It can spot the ASBO on bikes at twenty miles and can cover an entire housing scheme with just one operator and one weapons specialist.
Although the laser designation is powerful enough to knock ‘em...
8th Jun 2023, 19:40
Replies: 20,899
Views: 1,318,189
Posted By fitliker

This new neighbourhood watch scheme might be...

This new neighbourhood watch scheme might be little OTT .
1st Jun 2023, 12:19
Replies: 20,899
Views: 1,318,189
Posted By fitliker

Not what I had expected when they promised to...

Not what I had expected when they promised to take me camping
1st Jun 2023, 12:14
Replies: 20,899
Views: 1,318,189
Posted By fitliker

Mountain rescue helicopters replaced by a more...

Mountain rescue helicopters replaced by a more rapid response unit , should be great once they get the short hillside landings perfected . Or not
27th May 2023, 12:13
Replies: 20,899
Views: 1,318,189
Posted By fitliker

Far more effective than the wire brush and detol...

Far more effective than the wire brush and detol ma’am for getting those malingering around the sick bay back to the regiment . If the drums don’t get them moving to the beat , then the big scarey...
17th May 2023, 12:14
Replies: 20,899
Views: 1,318,189
Posted By fitliker

The new multilingual QRH is all pictures to...

The new multilingual QRH is all pictures to facilitate multilingual crew and those that cannot read without specs , more cunnilingual than multilingual me thinks
10th May 2023, 13:41
Replies: 20,899
Views: 1,318,189
Posted By fitliker

If you are going to die like WW2 cannon fodder...

If you are going to die like WW2 cannon fodder using WW2 equipment it is fitting and appropriate to be properly dressed in WW2 uniforms , nes pa ?
10th May 2023, 13:37
Replies: 20,899
Views: 1,318,189
Posted By fitliker

Matching on Grindr just before being sent to the...

Matching on Grindr just before being sent to the grinder
27th Apr 2023, 14:28
Replies: 20,899
Views: 1,318,189
Posted By fitliker

Just a little Wafer , bomb appetite

Just a little Wafer , bomb appetite
26th Apr 2023, 21:25
Replies: 20,899
Views: 1,318,189
Posted By fitliker

What are the brown star awards for ? Catching or...

What are the brown star awards for ? Catching or pitching ?
26th Apr 2023, 21:24
Replies: 20,899
Views: 1,318,189
Posted By fitliker

Real Shuriken go in edge first , those must be...

Real Shuriken go in edge first , those must be the Velcro practice Shuriken throwing stars .
23rd Apr 2023, 20:54
Replies: 20,899
Views: 1,318,189
Posted By fitliker

Someone did not get the memo about a fragrance...

Someone did not get the memo about a fragrance free work place .

The smell of Brut and beans is just too much for some , for others it is a way of life .
23rd Apr 2023, 13:54
Replies: 20,899
Views: 1,318,189
Posted By fitliker

Nothing like the bracing blast of cold sea water...

Nothing like the bracing blast of cold sea water on yer mug to refresh those parts that beer cannot reach .
23rd Apr 2023, 13:49
Replies: 20,899
Views: 1,318,189
Posted By fitliker

Klingons on the starboard bow or Clingons ?

Klingons on the starboard bow or Clingons ?
16th Apr 2023, 22:06
Replies: 20,899
Views: 1,318,189
Posted By fitliker

Just finished sampling the 25 year old Macallan...

Just finished sampling the 25 year old Macallan from the Quaich and some tourists dropped some coins in it and told me to buy some trousers .
11th Apr 2023, 23:02
Replies: 20,899
Views: 1,318,189
Posted By fitliker

Bit high risk dressing as a rabbit to go dogging...

Bit high risk dressing as a rabbit to go dogging in Croydon

Its a snow suit not a splooge suit .
9th Apr 2023, 15:07
Replies: 20,899
Views: 1,318,189
Posted By fitliker

Modern version of breaking someone on the wheel ,...

Modern version of breaking someone on the wheel , remarkably most persons broken in this way do so voluntarily !
8th Apr 2023, 18:48
Replies: 20,899
Views: 1,318,189
Posted By fitliker

There are fewer ball bearings in a lighter...

There are fewer ball bearings in a lighter unicycle than a heavier bicycle, but if your balls start bearing the weight you might wish you had two WHEELS
3rd Apr 2023, 18:15
Replies: 20,899
Views: 1,318,189
Posted By fitliker

Sung to the old beach boys classic : I wish...

Sung to the old beach boys classic :
I wish they all could be Caledonia Girls
Two girls for every boy

Way better than Twa Dogs , ya basser
Showing results 1 to 35 of 366
 


 
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